What is self-compassion?
Self compassion is being kind to ourselves when we suffer. We care for ourselves as we would care for someone we truly love. Self-compassion includes self-kindness.
A sense of common humanity and mindfulness.
~ Kirstin Neff
There are 3 aspects of self-compassion
Self-kindness:
Nurturing ourselves in times of struggle and difficulty. When we do not behave how we would like to, fall short, mess up or are in pain, self-kindness is learning to treat ourselves with love, sympathy, respect and understanding. We will make mistakes in our lives. When we do we are to practice self-kindness when we can meet ourselves without harsh judgement.
When we are suffering being able to soothe ourselves, and make room for the emotion instead of trying to ignore or block out our pain.
Developing a true love for ourselves that can weather any storm .
A sense of common Humanity:
As humans, we are uniquely and beautifully flawed. All of us experience pain, feelings of “not good enough”, times when life is not going how we want it to. Too often these emotions and experiences isolate us as we think, “ I am the only person suffering”. All humans suffer, we are mortal, vulnerable and imperfect. Remembering what we have in common, helps us feel connected and a part of the whole.
Mindfulness:
“Mindfulness is the awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally,”
Kabat-Zinn.
Self-compassion requires us to acknowledge negative thoughts and emotions. We learn to be open to observing them with clarity and kindness, not suppressing judging or denying them. As Kirstin Neff states, we cannot ignore our pain and feel compassion for it at the same time.
Why Self Compassion?
Studies have shown people who have self-compassion also have greater social connectedness, emotional intelligence, happiness, and overall life satisfaction. Self-compassion has also been shown to correlate with less anxiety, depression, shame, and fear of failure.
At The Connected Center we offer a special 4-week course to enable you to learn and practice the 3 aspects of Self Compassion. Read more:
